2.21.2005

In Which I Pick on Dan Brown, but Not Really

I believe that probably the best-known example of this will be Dan Brown, author of The DaVinci Code, so I'll use his name. But, really, I'm yelling at all of you filthy bums out there.

Dan Brown's characters are the kind that would seriously hyperventilate if ever they saw something as truly frightening as "The Ring" (which made me laugh, so I assume it was scary). I mean, anything even slightly out of the ordinary and they panic! In the aforementioned book, Brown tries to come off as a pagan sympathizer--but really, whenever his characters are exposed to anything unusual in terms of Christian history, as in maybe the Mona Lisa was originally painted with an Isis pendant (which I think is bullshit anyway), they freak out and get "chills". Seriously. What if they were told the earth was spherical-ish, or, even worse, that the Earth revolved around the Sun?

Would they commit suicide?

Really though, I don't see why people have to be so fucking horrified every time they hear something that doesn't go along with what they've been taught for years. This may have something to do with the average reaction to learning what Malcolm X really was about--like the part where he left the Nation of Islam--simply because it makes him look good, possibly *gasp* undermining the culture hero Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. is today.

You people disgust me. Why are you so afraid of admitting that your knowledge isn't solid? Bastards.

No comments: