Iron Man 2

On behalf of crazy cat (my lova, you know exactly of whom I speak), welcome to another special edition of [Blog Author] actually saw a movie opening weekend!

'Iron Man 2' automatically deserves 5 million points for not adding any 3D shenanigans at the last minute. Just for the record.

So if you like explosions, you'll like this. +, eye candy for dudes, chicks, the bicurious, and well pretty much everyone except the people who are into trannies...although I suspect it's supposed to be implied that Justin Hammer is one.

I read the Tribune movie review of this one, and it's starting to confirm my long-time suspicion that the guy who writes that is a bit of a wanker. He basically says that the plot is overcomplicated with too many characters...maybe if you're a hyperstimulated six-year-old who forgot to take their Ritalin (I think one might have been sitting in front of us, actually. Also, how annoying are the people who gasp every time any 'good' character gets smacked around a bit?).

Okay, so it's not as good as the first one...there wasn't room for as much insight into current events (Cold War implications, I'm glaring at you), + they gave Tony Stark daddy issues, meaning that there were touching moments unrescuable by the wit of, well, the entire cast. (You know how I feel about touching moments. I cringe at them. Because it's a fucking movie.) Oh, and the whole heart slash palladium thing is ridiculous on a House vs. Tritter scale: issue of epic seriousness gets resolved in, like, five minutes once shit comes to a head. Not to mention that if J.J. Abrams had been involved in this, he probably would have had the supercollider open a black hole into another dimension of twisty time scales woooOOoooo. (On the other hand, he might have been involved anyway: the science was kind of ridiculous. And I am saying this relative to the rest of it. How awesome is it that interactive screens and data displays are a real possibility?! Cf. TED.)


Explosions. Robotic suits battling it out (I think they may have added more sound effects: mildly annoying until the crashes and stuff take over). Graphics! There are points where it's obvious that images are digital composites, etc., but oh wow has stuff advanced, even since the first movie. Oh, plus awesome dialogue and sweet interactions (except for the daddy issues). And serious kicking of ass by hot chick in not-exactly-spandex. (Actually, there was a lot of ass in this movie in general. But not in a gross way...I'm looking at you, The Matrix Reloaded.)

So go ahead, indulge yourself. Spring for a regular non-matinee ticket, + student discount.

The one real disappointment was the Prince of Persia trailer. They gave him a name and a cute ragamuffin backstory...because Jake Gyllenhal's completely non-Persian nose and skin tone weren't irritating enough (I'm sure they're less annoying if you're, well, white, but it's mildly offensive that they couldn't find an ethnic actor to play what I'm sure is supposed to be a non-offensive role, cough 300). I think this might turn out to be Aladdin on steroids with a love interest.... 'The Last Airbender' (a.k.a. Nickolodeon's not-as-ridiculous Avatar) and 'Inception' looked alright, though the latter may secretly be a 'Paprika' ripoff with a less dreamy plot. Also, Shrek 4 is going to suck ass. Sorry.


Lady with the Lamp said...

you forgot to mention the hilarious antics of the 12 year old boys in front of us during the eclipse trailer.

The Reporter said...

Too true!

Evidently, twelve-year-old boys love Jacob although they don't want him to hurt Edward (or something like that...?). And older females are embarrassed by loud comments, but not by screaming loudly to possibly show their support.